Dear Nicholas and Jonathan,
Dad and I have always taken your education very seriously, but in choosing to live in the south, (where you can be lulled into thinking that the weather is your best friend), you have not learned a fundamental truth on how to handle inclement weather. And since you both speak the language of mathematics, allow me to enlighten you with the following formula:
temperature in the teens + gale force wind = winter coat
Now, this is a subject I've brought up in the past, and each time you have vehemently declared that you do not need a coat. And so I've watched you get by on sweatshirts or hoodies, occasionally coupled with a windbreaker if a snowflake or two happens to fall.
As your mother, I realize that part of your coat denial stems from the fact that you do not like to shop. At all. I understand completely, so today I have taken matters into my own hands which I will now present in the form of a word problem:
If you can't take the boy to the store, take the store to the boy.
That's right. After a busy morning driving here and there, I have now brought the store to you. Right now there are SIX winter coats in varying styles and sizes spread out in the family room. Try them on. I know you will not need to use it very often, but it's nice to have just in case ... you know, for the occasional snowstorm, camping in January, hiking the Himalayas, or THANKSGIVING IN CHICAGO.
So, do your mom a favor, and just pick the one you hate the least.