"Hey Mom," says our little guy. "There's a rumor going around that Susie Q has a crush on me."
As he's talking to me he's breaking the no-balls-in-the-house rule by bouncing a basketball in the kitchen, but I ignore this rule infraction in light of the fact that I am getting the scoop on playground gossip. Soap operas are wimpy in comparison to the high drama that occurs on the school playground, so I'm all ears.
"Is this the same Susie Q who always tattles on you?" I ask. "The one who you think is so bossy?"
"Yup," he replies, bouncing the basketball AND popping an Oreo into his mouth.
"Well, you know, sometimes when a girl likes a boy she will pretend the exact opposite," I explain. "In fact, she may even go out of her way to either ignore him or be especially rude to him."
He thinks about this. It's deep stuff. Complicated.
"Well, she must definitely have a crush on me then," he says. "That's really gross."
But he's grinning from ear to ear, so I know that he doesn't think it's gross at all. He grabs another cookie, makes me SWEAR not to tell his brothers, and he and his basketball head out the back door.
Like I said ... playground drama.
And so are the Days of our Lives.