An Italian-American living la dolce vita in the Deep South

An Italian-American living la dolce vita in the Deep South

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Beware of Men with Accents

A re-post to explain why I haven't been blogging lately ...

Every year at this time our city of Augusta hosts a "little" tournament called The Masters. This "little" golfing event is a huge economic boost to our local economy: hotels, caterers, lawn services, taxis, limousines, private drivers, tent rentals, restaurants, maids . . . and house rentals.

That's right. Many of us rent our homes. Coorporations or individuals give us a check, and we hightail it out of Dodge.

We have been renting our house for over ten years. Every year we deal with the same man from Dallas, Texas who runs a small business that caters clients at sporting events. He is a true southern gentleman, polite, with a soft Texas drawl that reduces my mind to mush. Really, I can't think straight when he speaks.

His voice reminds me of a summer night where it is too hot and humid to do anything but sit on a deep front porch drinking lemonade. Crickets are chirping, lightning bugs are flickering, and there are pauses between sentences that makes your mind slow down until you're not thinking but just taking it all in.

What is it about accents? Think Colin Firth's British or Hugh Jackman's Australian. Think of the French accent . . . the Italian . . . the Irish . . . and yes, the southern. Really, they hypnotize me.

Case in point: five years ago we informed our Texan, Jim, that because our son's due date was just before The Masters, we wouldn't be able to rent that year. Two days after Timothy's birth, Jim calls and, with that soft-spoken voice, asks if there was any way we would reconsider.

I listened to him talking, talking, talking and without even realizing it I agreed. The fact that I was nursing a newborn around the clock and had two days to get the house ready didn't even enter my mind.

Another example: this year Jim called us in early March to tell us that, because of the economy, several of his clients pulled out and he wouldn't be able to rent from us this year. He was so polite about it we weren't even disappointed. Fine. I would have a quiet spring. No cleaning out closets, doing yardwork, or washing linens.

Then, Tiger Woods won a golf tournament.

Sure enough, last night Jim called. In his soft-spoken manner he explained he recently acquired some clients and, since he knew we were planning on spending the week in Florida (it's our spring break), he wondered if he could possibly rent our home.

I did some quick thinking: I am up to my ears in deadlines, my husband is out of town and won't be back until Saturday, and we have to be packed and ready to go on Sunday. And while I was thinking, Jim kept talking . . . his soft accent swirling around my head . . .

I agreed.

Just shoot me now.

Of course, my husband is thrilled. But he is in Albuquerque. He is NOT here. He is far, far away. And I am here . . . working like a madwoman. Well. When he gets home, he'd better start speaking with an accent . . . that's all I'm saying.


15 comments:

Therese said...

I have to agree on the accents...what is it? Good luck getting everything done!

Cheryl Lage said...

SOoo funny, Bia! As a woman who's well acquainted (occasionally TOO well-acquainted) with southern accents, gimme an Italian accent ANY DAY.

Dean Martin singing in Italian? Heaven's soundtrack. (But yes, accents of your choosing ALWAYS attractive!)

Missy said...

I am a sucker for southern accents too! Well, now that I think about it - any accent will do!

We live in Alabama so we are practically neighbors!

GrandmaK said...

What can I say! I can be wooed by a "proper accent," too. You are a JOY! Have a grand spring break! Cathy

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

I love British accents, but I've never trusted a Southern one (on a guy, that is). Is that because I grew up Yankee?

And how do you get your house ready for strangers? Where do you put all your personal stuff?

Ua said...

Wow, Bia, I can't believe you have to get your house ready on such short notice! But it shouldn't be a problem; your house is always perfect anyway! Even with 3 boys!

Soutenus said...

Great post! I am literally LOL -- my husband has one of the most endearing Latino accent laced with a touch of southern . . . . Hearing it where I grew up (north of Philly - where it was all Philly accents and Italian accents with some PA Dutch thrown in for good measure) made me take notice immediately. The rest is history.

Amy Jo said...

And I think that it should be the accent of YOUR choice!

I have a thing for accents also...I have a secret desire to speak with an Irish accent. There's nothing like a serenade from a gentleman with an Irish accent!

:o) mg said...

"another fine mess"
I wouldn't sweat it too much. Your house is always immaculate.

Tiziana said...

Mi piacerebbe proprio sentire la voce di Jim.
Ma perchè non scrivi un libro? Sei bravissima.
Buon lavoro e buone vacanze.

Kim H. said...

I would have caved and said yes too. I'm just like that too -- and yes, what is it with men and accents. And Lord help us all if I ever ran in to a firefighter with an accent. I'm probably pass out cold!

So, where do you live when you have to move out?

E said...

And when they call you .."dahlin"...oh my just oh my. I can refuse them nothing either....

Nancy said...

oooh Biiiiiaaaaaa. Please send me your address so I can send along the giveaway you won! :)

SQUELLY said...

Oh no! this did make me chuckle - is chuckle a word that works in America? Well anyway hope everything went okay for you. God Bless!

Lisa said...

So, do you suppose that to an Italian or an Irishman or an Australian a midwestern American accent is attractive? :) (I'm a sucker for an accent, too. Especially Irish!)