Eating is serious business, so don't mess with me

This little guy makes the best light saber sounds, does a Star Wars force stop like nobody's business, and tells people to go take a nap. He's cute as can be ... but don't get between him and food.

In which we lie ... repeatedly

To plan a surprise 70th birthday party for my Mom whose birthday was yesterday (Sunday, July 3) we all had to tell some fibs ...


Fib #1: "Since we were all together three weeks ago for the cruise, and since last weekend we all returned from trips [Bia to Lake Tahoe, Laura to Myrtle Beach, and David to Haiti] we just need this weekend to recover." said Maria.


Fib #2: "What are we doing on Sunday? We have a church picnic," said Laura.


Fib #3: "How about you come here on Monday instead?" suggested David.


Fib #4: "We'll celebrate your birthday NEXT weekend," all of us said.


Fib #5: "It's my turn to do Sunday lunch, so come here and we'll have a small pre-birthday celebration. But come later -- more toward 1:15 -- because we are biking on the canal in the morning." said Maria, who needed time for everyone to get here before i Nonni.


I don't know how we pulled it off, but we did. Maybe it was all that fibbing ...

A Big Deal

On October 6, 2008 our oldest son announced:


"Guess what? Today I officially weigh 100 pounds."

I remember looking at my son. He had spaghetti sauce on his cheek, his hair was sticking up in the back, his arms were like toothpicks, and he was talking with his mouth full. He was still 100% boy, so the fact that his weight had finally reached triple digits took me by surprise.


Little boys grow up.


Darn it.


Today, his baby brother and I were leaving the Kroc Center after a workout when he said:


"Mom, come over here for a sec. I want to show you something."

He stepped on the scale and ... there it was ... 100 pounds.


He smiled hugely. It's a big deal in a boy's world.


But for a mom ... a little bittersweet.

Timothy's Corner

If I ever want to know what's going on in Timothy's world, I just have to visit this little corner in his room where a constantly changing vignette highlights his interests (airplanes and anything with an engine), memories (a spring break visit to LEGOLAND, our recent Caribbean cruise), and hobbies (Legos and Pokémon).

A boy's story is the best that is ever told.     

~Charles Dickens

Tangerine (book 4, week 4) ... and a book giveaway!!!

Yesterday, here's what Timothy said after returning late Monday night from a family cruise: It's already Tuesday, I don't have the entire week, so I don't think there's time for another book."


Yeah, yeah.


I simply kissed him on top of his head and handed him Tangerine by Edward Bloor, a book which is on his required summer reading list, has received rave reviews, and at 323 pages Timothy will be able to finish it before we leave next week for Lake Tahoe. I also reminded him that, so far, he's been faithfully reading a book a week and it would be terrible to ruin such a stellar streak. He was skeptical, but I can be pretty persuasive.


And to make things especially exciting (and because what boy doesn't like some healthy competition?) I am giving away a copy of Tangerine to one lucky winner! You have until Sunday night to leave a comment below, and when I post next week's summer reading selection I will also announce the winner and mail you the book (it will be shipped from Amazon).


My kid reads, your kid reads. That's what I call a win-win situation.


Good luck, and happy reading!


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Cruising with Royal Caribbean: a review in quick takes

My parents have been on 17 cruises, all with Royal Caribbean International. When they booked their 18th cruise in celebration of both my mother's 70th birthday and my parents' 50th wedding anniversary, they brought along the entire family -- all 18 of us.


A four day cruise to the Bahamas and CocoCay.


Whoa. Yeah, I know.


Last Friday, after almost a year in the planning, all 18 of us met at Port Canaveral in Florida, boarded Majesty of the Seas, and set sail into what would be a marvelous adventure. During the day everyone scurried about -- pool, casino, arcade, basketball court, art auction -- and in the evening we met in the formal dining room and had dinner together. There was so much to do, and we made every moment count.


And now, our cruise in quick takes ...

~1~ What's for dinner?

(And lunch, and breakfast, and afternoon snack, and midnight snack ...)

For me, nothing was more relaxing than having each and every meal taken care of. And while I enjoyed the lunch buffet, I especially loved having breakfast and dinner in the formal dining room complete with the crisp, white table linens, attentive servers, and printed menus. Oh, the selections! With encouragement from my parents (who, after all, are expert cruisers) sometimes we ordered TWO appetizers, and I'm pretty sure the older boys ordered TWO entrees every single night. And if the server noticed that someone (Timothy) didn't like something (the Tiger Shrimp), she whisked it away and brought a replacement (hamburger sliders). And then there were the dinner rolls. I think our two tables developed a reputation for the amount of rolls we consumed ...




I'm not even going to tell you what a production it was to get this photo taken.
Teens complained, kids ran around, and the photographer was
overwhelmed, all while Nonna was insisting that we take this photo "or else!"
 It's not perfect, but it's family. You know?

~2~ Nassau was hot.

I'm talking hot as in ... steamy. And by steamy I mean humid. And by humid I mean we walked around for an hour, purchased a slushy, and then returned to the ship where we promptly jumped in the pool. And because most everyone else was still in town, we had both the pool AND the ice cream machine to ourselves. That's what you call a win-win situation.

This was before exploring Nassau;
afterwards, I was wilting.

Cooling off with a frozen margarita after exploring Nassau.

~3~ Cabin Steward Magic

I don't know how it works, but somehow our cabin steward ALWAYS knew when we left our cabin because every time we came back POOF! everything was neat and clean. Our beds were made in the morning, the covers were turned down in the evening, and the cutest towel animals were posed on our pillows. At one point Joe started to complain about him coming in so often, and I told him to hush. The cabin steward was doing everything I do on a daily basis (well, not the towel animals) and I liked being pampered.

There was also a bunny, a sting ray, and a
monkey hanging from the window.

~4~ Castaway on CocoCay

This was my favorite part of the cruise; I mean, a PRIVATE island with white sand, crystal water, beaches, a barbecue feast, and beach chairs you could drag down to the water to sit and watch the sting rays. What more could you ask for? It was heavenly.

The entire island was ours to explore.

The views were breathtaking.
The water was crystal clear.
Island tranquility.

Our ship as seen from CocoCay.

~5~ Up, up and away over CocoCay

There were several excursions offered on Coco Cay. Some members of our family simply wanted to swim and soak up the sun, others went jet skiing, but Timothy and I were the ONLY ones in the family who went parasailing. We were nervous, maybe even more than a little scared, but what an adventure it was! An hour later my hands were still shaking because of the adrenaline rush.


(On a side note: I did not bring my camera on the boat, but a nice man offered to take some photos which he later texted to me. He also took a video, but I'm not posting it because I am laughing maniacally and sound positively deranged.)

Timothy and me.
Four hundred feet over the Caribbean Sea.
There are no words.

~6~ A lounge by any other name ...

Every evening, if you entered the 7th floor lounge, walked past the live band and around the dance floor, then peeked into the very far corner ... you would find these guys having a Pokémon Tournament.

Pokémon Tournament

~7~ Hodgepodge thoughts

-While this was a first cruise for many in our family, it was actually our second. Joe and I took our first cruise 25 years ago (10 days with Royal Caribbean) for our honeymoon!


-This was the first time our oldest son could order alcoholic beverages. As a parent, watching your son order a beer is ... I don't know ... yikes! It was also the first time our two older sons tried their luck in a casino. Again ... yikes.


-I know the suspense is building ... did she, or did she not buy a watch? Despite being tempted at every turn, alas, I did NOT buy a watch. I did buy one for my mom, though.


-Back to Coco Cay, if only to share a corny joke as told by a comedian we heard our first night on board:


"I hear we're going to CocoCay and I don't even know what that is; to me, it sounds like a waitress from Atlanta who says, 'We don't have Pepsi. Coke okay?'"


You laughed, didn't you?

I laughed at that stupid joke the entire cruise.

~8~ And finally ... hodgepodge photos.

Beach bag: Charming Charlie
Hat: Target
I used both a lot.

Joe, taking in the sights.

Boys ... they clean up nicely.

The 80's Dance Party was so much fun!

One of the lifeboats for Majesty of the Seas.

This is what it looks like to drive home after a wonderful
Royal Caribbean cruise filled with great entertainment,
fine dining, and nonstop fun.

Thanks Nonna and Nonno (and Royal Carribean's Majesty of the Seas) for a wonderful
vacation. We created memories that will last forever!

Me Before You: Book vs. Movie

The book vs. the movie

Amazingly, the movie stayed (mostly) true to the book. Events unfold just as they do in the book and the same conversations take place. There were some things left out – Mr. Traynor’s infidelity, the estrangement of Will’s parents, the side story of Lou’s sister – and while those omission didn’t affect the flow of the story I was disappointed that they left out the entire episode of Lou getting lost in the maze. For me, that was a big moment in the book when Will, despite being confined to a wheelchair, becomes the hero when he rescues her, comforts her, and helps her to face her demons.

The characters

They could not have found a more perfect actress to play Lou. She was cute, funny, self-effacing, brave, loving – basically everything you imagined her to be. Really, all the characters were spot on. I especially loved Lou’s boyfriend (also known as Running Man) who, in his all self-centeredness, was oddly endearing.  And if you think he reminds you of Neville Longbottom from the Harry Potter series, why, you would be correct. He’s all grown up, now. And funny.

Did you notice …

I’ve read the book three times. I’ve seen the movie. Here are a few interesting interpretations, insights, symbolisms, and ironies I noticed:

-Lou is caring for a man who cannot walk while dating someone who is training for a triathlon.

-It’s interesting that the author chose the name Will who, in the end, no longer has the will to live.

-The title, Me Before You, can be interpreted a variety of ways: Will before meeting Lou or, conversely, Lou before meeting Will – or more simply, who I was before I met you. But critics of the book have pointed out that the title can also be viewed as me before you (a selfish attitude) as opposed to you before me (a sacrifice).

-In the book, Lou’s mother is one of the most vocal against Will’s decision. Her viewpoint is strongly maternal, and in the movie it is not a coincidence that she is wearing a gold cross necklace.

Dignitas

When I first read the book I had never heard of Dignitas and so I googled it, thinking that the author, Jojo Moyes, had made it up. She didn’t. The Dignitas motto, To live with dignity – to die with dignity, highlights the association’s goal of providing counseling with regard to all end of life issues including accompaniment of dying patients and assistance with a self-determined end of life. In other words, assisted suicide.

As I browsed the website, everything that is Catholic within me was horrified. I know that over the years there have been countless stories of people choosing to end their life rather than be faced with a debilitating illness, such as Brittany Maynard who ended her life rather than succumb to brain cancer. But this … to make an appointment to die? To travel to Switzerland (where assisted suicide is legal), check in, say goodbye to loved ones, and then … check out of life? It just felt wrong on so many levels.

Dignitas in the movie

Now, I will tell you that the movie glossed over the Dignitas angle; in fact, other than a quick view of the name in a letterhead, it’s not really mentioned and never is it fully explained. Honestly, if I hadn’t read the book I don’t think I would have fully understood what Will was planning to do. Nor does the scene provide any insight as to how Will actually dies. One minute Will is in bed saying goodbye, and in the next scene he isn’t there.

There is no doubt that the movie sugar-coats Will’s decision. Maybe the producers backed off from an emotionally charged subject, or maybe they wanted to concentrate on the romance part of the story. Either way, there is much more depth in the book.

Yes, I know, they’re just characters in a book and actors in a movie …

Oh, the tears I shed (all three times I read the book). But for heaven’s sake! It’s a book. With characters. It’s a movie. With actors. And yet, that is probably one of the things that hit home for me because there I was, getting emotionally entangled in the story, but somewhere out there in this big world this is someone’s life. Somewhere out there someone isn’t reading a story … but living it.  

What would you do …

In high school I had an English teacher who expected us to spend the first ten minutes of class journaling on a topic she had written on the board. One day the topic was this: “Do you think you have the capacity to kill?” I was emphatic with my answer: No. Killing is wrong. We are made in the image of God and to take another life is a sin. Mankind should strive for all that is good, pure, and holy. We are meant to protect our fellow brothers and sisters. I wrote furiously for ten minutes.

But afterwards our teacher offered some what if scenarios: What if you were in a kill or be killed situation? What if you were in a kill or have a loved one be killed situation? She wasn’t being dramatic  (although now that I think about it she had set up a classic Hunger Games scenario); she was teaching us that we live in a world in which the lines between right and wrong are sometimes obscured by more than a little gray; that we can vehemently declare to know what we will do in a certain situation, but do we know? Really? How could we unless we are in the reality? And if we can’t truly know, how can we possible judge?

Why I loved the book (and liked the movie) …

I read the book long before I knew they were making a movie. The book does not glorify in any way the right to die issue, nor does it insinuate in any way that anyone with a physical disability is less of a person; if anything, it shows the incredible pain and devastation left behind with an individual's decision to end his/her own life. I thought the book did an excellent job of giving us a peek (and just a peek because we can never really know) of the incredible physical and emotional pain that some people face, and while I still emphatically disagreed with Will's decision (I was so ANGRY with him), for the first time I could come from a place not of understanding or acceptance, but of empathy and compassion.

Think about this: Will had the money for around-the-clock care. He could travel. He had excellent caretakers. He even got the girl. So why did he still want to die? How could he do that? We don’t know because he was in a place we can never be.

Over the past few weeks I’ve seen countless articles condemning the movie as “dangerous” because of how it ends; that it portrays assisted suicide in such a manner that it might be construed as morally acceptable; that “Louisa et al” should have helped Will sort through and address his problems and the fact they stood by and let it happen makes them murderers (although I honestly don’t know what else “Louisa et al” could have done). That’s why the book was so thought-provoking … there wasn’t a single character who knew what to do. And why should they? How can anyone be prepared for something like that?

In the end, Will's decision to die reverberated through the lives of everyone he knew, and anyone can see how most of it resulted in a lot of pain. So although the book didn't end the way I would've wanted it to end, there is a lesson in Will’s choice.  Not answers, but lessons.