Saturday, August 31, 2019

Do Things Yesterday


Last night I had a dream.

It was the night before our departure for Italy and everyone was spending the night at our house. (And that’s everyone as is in ALL 32 women).

In the midst of the craziness Joe whispered the dreaded “P word” in my ear which is a bad, bad word in our house. I get more lectures about procrastination only because, well, Joe does things yesterday and I do thing tomorrow.

ANYWAY, in my dream I had decided to pack in the morning (the day of the trip) because I would have plenty of time (hence the the "P word"). 

You can probably see where this is going. 

A storm during the night knocks out power to all our clocks, and all the backup batteries were dead. Do you know that scene in Home Alone when the family oversleeps and everyone is running around trying to get ready for their trip to Paris? Yeah, that one. In my dream I had 45 minutes to shower, get ready, and pack my suitcase. I was a wild woman trying to get everything done; at one point, I texted Joe (who was downstairs and couldn’t hear through the chaos of 32 women)  to GET MY PASSPORT OUT OF THE SAFE and to HURRY IT UP because WE NEEDED TO LEAVE RIGHT NOW.

I woke up with my heart pounding.

Moral of the story: Be like Joe (who does things yesterday) and not like me (who does things tomorrow).

The end.



Friday, August 30, 2019

The Trip to Somewhere

Joe has planned a little family trip for Labor Day Weekend.

Now, you're probably wondering where we are going. Yeah, about that. I would tell you except I DON'T KNOW. Even after using my Mom Interrogation Skills (which are pretty awesome), I know nothing.

Joe knows where we're going. So does Timothy. Even my parents know.

But not me.

It's TOP SECRET INFORMATION and I'm the only one who doesn't have clearance.


Saturday, August 24, 2019

Speak to Me Sunday: words


i like words that
mean what they sound 
bamboozle, flummox, festoon
or sound what they mean 
chattanooga choo choo.

sometimes words
mean something mean 
devious, diabolical, machiavellian
or invoke a dream 
quixotic, visionary, idyllic.

you can laugh
at words that are funny 
cattywampus, discombobulate, wonky
or words that are funny to say 
worcestershire, hullabaloo, flibbertigibbet

there are words
for letting go 
ephemeral, evanescent, fleeting
or others for holding tight
grasp, clench, embrace.

some words
inspire change 
adventure, creativity, curiosity
or provide anchor 
gratitude, contentment, peace.

mostly though
i like words 
spoken and written
or, neither spoken nor written
but understood.

*from the files of very bad poetry by bia



Friday, August 23, 2019

La Bella Figura, ch. 6

"I once watched Nonna eat a tomato. We had just gone shopping, and as we were unpacking the groceries Nonna reached into a brown paper bag and pulled out a juicy red tomato that the farmer promised had been picked from the vine just that morning. Then, holding it like an apple, Nonna bit into the tomato. She closed her eyes in bliss as she chewed, and when I giggled she opened one eye, looked at me, and took another huge bite. She was passionately living in the moment which, I later realized, is the key to la bella figura. If you have a passion for something then you give it your very best, which consequently means you are living completely, wholly in the moment. There are no half measures."

An Ocean, an Airplane, and Two Countries Full of Kisses (La Bella Figura, ch. 6)


An Ocean, an Airplane, and Two Countries Full of Kisses
available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble. 

Thursday, August 22, 2019

La Dolce Vita Travels: Riding the Wave

Rome, 2015. My sister and I are standing in front of Michelangelo's Pietà in St. Peter's Basilica.

Today, just 27 days away from our 2019 Girls' Trip to Italy, I look at this photo and experience the waves of emotions which result when art, history, culture, and travel collide.

They are powerful emotions.

And I look forward to riding the waves.


Thursday, August 15, 2019

The Bra Workout


WARNING: If you are a guy, I don’t think you’ll be interested in this, so just mosey on along. But for you gals … continue reading.

I’m sure many of you would agree that shopping can be a workout. Bathing suits, skinny jeans, and the perfect prom dress require oodles of time, so much so that you write it on your calendar. THURSDAY: mall for bathing suits; SATURDAY: find perfect pair of jeans. Shopping for these items also involve marathon try-on sessions which, as in the case of bathing suits and skinny jeans, turn you into a contortionist that would put any Cirque de Soleil performer to shame.

And then there is bra shopping, which took up TWO HOURS of my time this morning.

I’m sure you’re scoffing. Two hours? How can that be? Allow me …

First, the selection of bra types is mind boggling: minimizer, t-shirt, push-up, racerback, full coverage, underwire, cross-back, balconette, bandeau, contour, convertible, full cup, demi cup, maternity, padded, plunge, shelf, stick-on, and strapless.

Then, the size you THOUGHT you were isn’t working anymore. You know this because, having been professionally fitted, reality comes crashing down with the news that you’ve been wearing the wrong bra size all along. Well then. Now you know.

But you don’t, not really, because knowing your perfect fit is just a STARTING POINT. You now need to convert your professionally fitted bra recommendation to the size and type of EVERY brand of bra because a 34B or a 38C is not the same across the board.

The cruelest thing? The sizes don’t necessarily translate between color because when you find the perfect fitting black bra, you go pick out a nude one in the same style and size thinking that your job is now done, but the nude one doesn’t fit the same as the black one.

Let me repeat that: same size and brand, but a different color, and the sizing is off. What the heck?

So you can see how the two hours were necessary. A SWEATY two hours because… well … Cirque du Soleil in the dressing room.

See? A workout, I tell you.



Sunday, August 11, 2019

Speak to Me Sunday: Now Moments


an early weekday morning ... whispers in the dark ... 
a quiet breakfast ... a quiet drive ... 
first day of school ... 

10th grade, when just yesterday it was kindergarten

~~~~~~~~~~

after dinner, still at the kitchen table ... a board game ... 
brother vs. brother ... mother vs. sons ... laughter ... 
mom loses ...

but nonetheless wins

~~~~~~~~~~

Sunday evening ... one phone call, then two ... 
one son, then the other ... voices deep, young men now ...  
checking in with mom ... 

calling home

~~~~~~~~~

cooking again ... dishes again ...
the repetition of chores ... but then, a husband holding a flower ...
and just like that ...

what chores?

~~~~~~~~~~

a cardinal in the sprinklers ... a blue jay on the fence ...
splashes of colors ... later, a rainstorm in the sun ... a rainbow in the gray
revelations...

things you see when you look


You must live in the present,
launch yourself on every wave,
find your eternity in each moment.

-Henry David Thoreau