Speak to Me Sunday: Actively Waiting (Second Sunday in Advent)

This week I came across a YouTube video of Fr. Manno giving a lesson on what we should be doing during Advent. His answer? We wait. But then he explained the difference between active vs. inactive waiting, and how during Advent we should be actively waiting; that is, as we wait for the Christ Child we are not meant to sit around doing nothing. Instead, we prepare. 

His commentary reminded me of the motto verso l'alto (towards the height), words often associated with the life of Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati. While on one level the words refer to our earthly struggle as we climb toward the summit of eternal life, they are also a rallying cry for what we do while climbing. 

For we should always be doing something ...

Two summers ago I climbed a mountain.

I was in Breckenridge, Colorado with three friends, and early one morning we stood at the beginning of a 3.4 mile hiking trail that went straight up a mountain to Mohawk Lake.

Over dirt trails, rocky crevices, and overgrown roots we climbed up and up. We crossed streams, walked through meadows, and climbed over logs. We passed other hikers going up and said hello to hikers going back down. We made a wrong turn, which turned our 3.4 miles of going up into 4.2 miles of going up. We were tired. Sometimes it hurt to breathe. We laughed, we encouraged each other, we stopped to take in the breathtaking views. During the last mile, the trail turned rocky, the ascent became even steeper, and we weren’t so much hiking as looking for footholds and pulling ourselves up and over large boulders.

Then, after almost four hours of hiking and climbing, after four hours of not being able to see the peak but nevertheless continuing because we knew it was there, after all that time of looking upward as we climbed, we arrived. Finally. And the feeling was indescribable.

There was exuberance, yes, and certainly a feeling of accomplishment. But mostly I felt humbled to have worked, and struggled, and climbed, and sweated in order to finally arrive exactly where we had been heading. And as I caught my breath and drank in the view, I thought of a prayer card I had with a photo of Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati climbing a mountain with the words Verso l’Alto written in the corner.   

These Italian words were scribbled onto a photograph in 1925 by Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati, and they have become representative of his earthly life while striving to reach the summit of eternal life. Translated literally, verso is a preposition meaning towards – not in action, but in orientation – as in, what are we heading towards? Alto, on the other hand, is a noun meaning height. So while the words Verso l’Alto mean towards the height, Pier Giorgio Frassati showed us that they don’t so much refer to the physical act of climbing as what we are doing while climbing; in other words, they refer to the Christian’s spiritual journey – and all we do while on that journey – as we strive to reach the height of heaven.

So, as I stood on the shores of Mohawk Lake on top of that mountain, as I breathed in the crisp mountain air and delighted in the indescribable beauty, I also felt restlessness – a longing for more. I remembered how Carl Frederick Buechner, in his book Listening to Your Life, said that the unease (or incompleteness) we may feel is the sound God’s voice makes in a world that has explained him away. 

And that’s why I felt humbled because I knew there are more mountains to scale. God is forever calling us to him and in our spiritual journey one can move forward or backward, but one cannot stand still.

We are meant to be heading somewhere; we are meant to strive, and climb, and struggle. We will have moments of rest, but when we rise we will, like the Wise Men following that star, look up and continue climbing …

verso l’alto.

Pier Giorgio wrote the words verso l'alto on the back of a photo 

taken by a fellow climber on June 7, 1925. 

Spreading a Little Christmas Cheer

Yesterday I set out a basket of snacks outside our front door. I cannot take credit for this idea, and I can't even remember where I first saw it, but it's an idea that is meant to be shared. Have a happy day everyone!

And because we are all so busy, I've also included some decorating ideas that cost NOTHING due to a little foraging inside and outside.

This year Christmas is all about grabbing my clippers and foraging -- in the woods behind our house, in my parents' back yard, at a secret location in town. Easy, beautiful, and free.

front door wreath

1 flat basket 

an assortment of fresh greenery 

1 large bow

antique lantern

1 antique lantern

an assortment of fresh greenery

1 large bow

bird bath

1 leaky bird bath

1 antique lantern

an assortment of greenery

a ceramic cardinal

1 large bow

In Which I Lecture My Guys About Football

This past Saturday, I lectured my guys.

About too much football. (And yes, I think there is such a thing.)

On Saturday morning my guys woke up and watched pregame shows. Then they watched football all afternoon, pausing only for lunch (which I provided). Late in the afternoon we attended Saturday night Mass, but the guys huddled in the car until the last minute listening to the Penn State game, and as soon as church ended and as we were walking to our car, they whipped out their phones to check the score. A quick dinner, and then it was football the rest of the night.

Whenever I walked in to tell them something, or ask a question, they would do that football watching thing: you know, where they turn their heads in my direction (as if they were listening) but keep their eyes glued to the television.

Football. All. day. long.

And so I sat them down and gave them a lecture. I used words like balance, stressed the importance of taking breaks, and pointed out that there are others in the family (uh, that would be me) who would like to do other things (like, have a conversation) (or go for a walk) (or watch a movie).

I think they got my point because they all grinned ... you know, like guilty little boys caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

Later, as we were reading in bed, Joe said that he would watch a Hallmark Christmas movie with me the next day.

STOP. IT.

Why, just that afternoon I had recorded the Hallmark movie, Christmas in Rome. And the thought of us watching a charming, but predictable, chick flick made me smile. This was going to be good. I might even make some hot chocolate. With marshmallows.

EXCEPT.

Except we woke up Sunday morning and NO CABLE. At all. No DVR. No nothing. When we called our cable company they said they'd send someone out on Monday (late afternoon).

So, I'm not really sure what the moral of this story is other than when Bia lectures ... things happen.

Eating and Brushing and Brushing ... Oh My!

 Here’s the routine of my days: eat, brush, eat, brush, eat, brush, brush, floss.

That’s life with Invisalign.

Just to be clear, after every meal not only do I brush my teeth, but I also brush my tray (or retainer, or whatever it’s called).

And yes, before bedtime I have to brush TWICE...once with toothpaste, and once with Gel-Kam.

When I realized that my dental hygiene was more involved (all that brushing, brushing, brushing) I went to Target and bought a cute ceramic mug to hold two toothbrushes, two different kinds of toothpaste, floss, and my tray case. 

I’ve also decided there will be NO MORE SNACKING between meals because I’m not taking out a tray (or retainer) unless I absolutely have to. Otherwise I have to brush my teeth. Again.

But I’m not complaining. My teeth are straightening and I’m losing weight. 

That’s called a win-win situation.

One Year

Yesterday marked one year when I tiptoed into the publishing waters with my book, An Ocean, an Airplane, and Two Countries Full of Kisses.

When I say tiptoed, that's exactly what I meant. If you want to feel vulnerable, just create something (a piece of artwork, a book), put your name on it, and put it out there for scrutiny. Then, as you wait to see how it will be received, you worry about getting feedback just as much as you worry about NOT getting feedback. And oh! the questions we weave when we are trying to please: Will my relatives like it? Will people (outside my family) read it? Will people buy it? Did I share too much, or not enough? Should I do this, or that, or nothing at all to promote it? 

But you know what? When I tiptoed into those waters I never imagined being carried on a current to new places and given the opportunity to meet new people. Book talks, emails from strangers, messages from friends, reviews and blurbs (Augusta Magazine "Hot off the Press", Ambassador Magazine "Italian American Reader), interviews (Voyage Atlanta, My Modern Italian Network) ... none of this would have happened if I had stayed on the shore.

And that is probably what I am most proud of--taking a chance, venturing into the unknown, being brave when I felt anything but.

So here I am a year out, and in the words of James Brown ... I feel good! And grateful. And humbled.

Christmas is around the corner, so here are several ways you can get a copy: 

1- For locals, I keep copies here at home. And I'll even sign it for you ;-)

2- Amazon

3- Barnes & Noble

4- And if you're flying out of The Augusta Regional Airport, pick up a copy at The Landings Gift Shop

Such kind reviews, notes, and messages!

Whenever I give a book talk, I always begin with the story of a fountain, 

for generations of our family have stood in front of this fountain in Verona.

The Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Thanksgiving Idea

This year I am hosting Thanksgiving (for twenty-two) and I had a horrible, no good, very bad idea.

It's such a horrible, no good, very bad idea that it has me smiling. A lot.

Here's that idea: a fun, family Thanksgiving photo booth. For goofy photos, family photos, and everything in between.

I can hear my guys groaning already.

But look ... the weather will be a delightful 67 degrees, the trees are in full autumnal glory, and we will be eating outside under a canopy of red, brown, yellow, and orange. So really, how perfect would a Thanksgiving photo booth be?

Am I right, or am I right? (Just don't ask my guys.)

And it was meant to be. Just when all the nurseries and garden centers have converted into Christmas tree lots, I happened to stop at Good Earth where I spotted a small bin of pumpkins and, out back, a row of corn stalks ... all of which they practically gave me.

So you see, a Thanksgiving Photo Booth was meant to be. And I even have props ...

Speak to Me Sunday: A Modern Parable

This fall weather has been just gorgeous, and so in preparing for a bike ride a few days ago I decided to bring my camera. There is a certain spot along the canal that, if you didn't know better, you would think you were in the rugged wilderness of Colorado. And with the crisp, blue sky and the sun's rays dancing among the trees, I knew it would be a perfect morning for photos.

When I reached the area I wanted to photograph, I got off my bike to walk alongside the canal's edge. I took some pictures, then walked a little further and took some more. Suddenly, a cyclist whirled past me at a high speed, only to come to a screeching halt in a whirlwind of dust. He turned around, and came back toward me.

"Are you okay?" he asked me. "I saw you  pushing your bike and thought you might need some help."

Of course, I was perfectly fine, but it didn't escape me that I was experiencing the biblical parable of The Good Samaritan in a very real and modern way.

As far as parables go, it's one that offers drama: a mugging, a near-death, and ultimately the rescue by a kind and caring stranger. Perhaps one of the reasons the parable resonates so well is because all of us, at some time or another, have played all the roles in the story. There have been times we have needed help, other times we have been the source of help, and sometimes (and this may be painful to admit) we have walked on by.

To further complicate matters, life is messy, and in our ongoing quest to find the perfect job, have the perfect marriage, raise perfect children, and develop perfect bodies we do not like to be reminded that, in fact, we are living in an imperfect world. We don't want to be in the position to need help, or to complicate our lives by becoming involved, or to face moral decisions of what is the right thing to do.

Ever since his election Pope Francis has said that he prefers a Church which is bruised and dirty from having been out on the streets; that we need to come out of our comfort zones – leave our schools, churches and homes – and go out to confront illness, poverty, ignorance, injustice, prejudice, pain. All those elements of humanity which are messy. All those things which make people not experiencing them, uncomfortable. Offended, even.

Which is why the parable of The Good Samaritan reads like a modern-day how-to manual on what it means to truly love our neighbor.

In the end, I was grateful this morning that I didn't need help from my kind Samaritan, but I was also very, very touched that he didn't know that but went out of his way to stop anyway. And because he stopped, two strangers spent a few minutes talking, sharing, and marveling at the beautiful sunrise over the Savannah River.